I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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