i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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