I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
