I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
