no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
