I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
