YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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