She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
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