Dual....:-)
my mouth tastes like poor choices
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Randomize
