I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
