Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Randomize
