Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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