Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
