my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Randomize
