My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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