just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
