You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize