He is an equal opportunity slut.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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