she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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