JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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