Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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