38 yer olds are good kisserssss
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
