If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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