I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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