Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
