are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
