I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
we're so committed to being not committed
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
