This girl is more easily done than said...
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
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