i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
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