So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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