I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie