so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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