I wish I could teleport
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
