hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
