at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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