Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (424): View more from California

  I'd wear matching sweaters with you

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  (424): I'd wear matching sweaters with you http://tfl.nu/xbhf
  Replies (3) Good night (2090) Bad night (1141)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.

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  (651): Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward. http://tfl.nu/djmy
  Replies (64) Good night (1798) Bad night (8357)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.

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  (440): Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues. http://tfl.nu/5zyy
  Replies (23) Good night (3461) Bad night (621)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.

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  (707): i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either. http://tfl.nu/icf7
  Replies (55) Good night (4410) Bad night (499)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust

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  (530): Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust http://tfl.nu/l0ps
  Replies (10) Good night (3601) Bad night (887)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.

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  (703): just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator. http://tfl.nu/c4j4
  Replies (26) Good night (609) Bad night (6762)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.

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  (859): Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right. http://tfl.nu/hrwa
  Replies (71) Good night (7043) Bad night (844)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.

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  (832): I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice. http://tfl.nu/6cq1
  Replies (9) Good night (1609) Bad night (6817)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?

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  (231): OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend? http://tfl.nu/ma89
  Replies (80) Good night (2310) Bad night (15358)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in

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  (773): She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in http://tfl.nu/bue7
  Replies (6) Good night (3884) Bad night (803)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days

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  (412): Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days http://tfl.nu/6wcx
  Replies (9) Good night (4385) Bad night (873)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.

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  (405): Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast. http://tfl.nu/xva7
  Replies (5) Good night (2355) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.

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  (413): He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex. http://tfl.nu/az8i
  Replies (1) Good night (300) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?

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  (+44): Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today? http://tfl.nu/cfiq
  Replies (2) Good night (527) Bad night (504)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.

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  (727): So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink. http://tfl.nu/ln3w
  Replies (4) Good night (596) Bad night (219)

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