I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
