How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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