I wish life had little blips of pornography
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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