every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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