the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Randomize
