Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Drunk is not a location!
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
