In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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