you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I need to calm my uterus...
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
