Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating