no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize