It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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