I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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