Buhtt sex?
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I have already put on my inside pants.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
