U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
