HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Randomize
